BADWATER
Located in Death Valley, California, Badwater is the lowest point in North America; Badwater is 282 feet below sea level; while much of Death Valley is scalding hot, dry, and covered in salt, Badwater has a small, ancient spring; in the pool at Badwater lives the Death Valley pupfish, also known as Cyprinodon salinus; the Death Valley pupfish is a remnant of the last Ice Age, and the only species of its kind left on Earth; the hottest temperature ever recorded in North America is 134 degrees Fahrenheit—on July 10th, 1913, in Death Valley; I was in Death Valley for two days this past February; my parents flew to Las Vegas, then planned to visit Death Valley; a surprising amount of Fall and Winter rain in California resulted in the greatest floral growth in Death Valley in almost a century; my parents are the sort to fly across America to look at flowers growing in the desert; I am their youngest child; even though I was not initially invited, I decided to join my parents; I drove alone five hours northeast from Los Angeles; I left too late in the day, and by the time I turned right from US-395 North to CA-190 East, it was around nine o’clock at night; CA-190 takes you over 70 miles into Death Valley, and at night, it is dark, barren, and if you are alone, spooky; there is nothing; I was listening to a podcast of Thom Yorke on NPR, but my iPod finally died while on CA-190; with no human voices to keep me company, I felt incredibly lonely; somehow, my cell phone still got reception; I called my friend Elliot in Brooklyn, and when I asked what he was doing, he said he was watching the lunar eclipse from his rooftop; I told him I did not see a lunar eclipse, but when I looked up and to my right, there it was: a full moon, the color of blood; I got off the phone, and spent the rest of the trip following the maroon moon; the last time I saw a lunar eclipse was in October of 2004, and I was on the Upper West Side of Manhattan; I was meeting a friend at Lincoln Plaza Cinemas to see a late screening of the Alexander Payne film, “Sideways”; when I emerged from the Columbus Circle subway at 59th street, there were hundreds of people standing still on the sidewalk, staring at the night sky; I thought Manhattan was under attack again, but then I realized these people were collectively craning their necks to see the lunar eclipse; it seemed like mass hypnosis, a gaggle of Manhattan Moonies; when I made my way deep into the heart of Death Valley, I thought I had come upon a desert sea; the light from the moon reflected off the desert floor, glimmering, like a body of water full of bioluminescent plankton; I stopped my car in the middle of the highway, turned to the side, and flashed on my high-beams; there were no cars, no lights, nothing—so I got out of my car and walked off the highway; the ground beneath my feet crunched like snow; there was no water: this was an ocean of salt; I checked into our hotel—the Furnace Creek Inn—and met my parents; the next day, we picked armfuls of Desert Gold (a vibrant yellow flower) and explored Zabriskie Point—which was overrun with fannypack-wearing German tourists—as well as Badwater; I saw a school of tiny pupfish, and fantasized about reaching into the spring, grabbing one, and swallowing the salty desert sardine whole; I restrained myself; my parents and I walked a couple hundred yards past the spring, into the center of a salt field, and my father had me pose for photographs; we argued about the photos, because he wanted mountains behind me, but this position required me to stare directly into the sun; I gave in; this was not an uncommon fight for us; a month later, the half-dozen photos that my father took of me arrived in the mail; in the photographs, I am wearing a yellow shirt, blue hat—and glaring; I look like I want to fistfight; it is a desert mugshot; this is not how I want to think of myself, or how I want my parents to think of me; is this really how I look?; this is also not how I want to remember Death Valley; examining these photos of myself, I can not help but think of a poem a friend recently sent me (“Archaic Torso of Apollo,” by Rainer Maria Rilke); in the final stanza of Rilke’s poem about a headless statue, he writes: “…would not, from all borders of itself, / burst like a star: for here there is no place/ that does not see you. You must change your life.”

I found your blog on google and read a few of your other posts. I just added you to my Google News Reader. Keep up the good work. Look forward to reading more from you in the future.